Karr's Joke Corner

[ツMiss★Staяღ]

LMAO...

Wife asked her husband to describe her.
He looked at her, then said, "You're A, B, C, D, E, F, G, H, I, J, K".
She asks, "What does that mean"?
He said, "Adorable, Beautiful, Cute, Delightful, Elegant, Foxy, Gorgeous, Hot."
She smiled and said, "Oh, that's sweet, but what about 'I, J, K? "
He said, "I'm Just Kidding' ".
..................................
His eye is still swollen, but it will get better..

---

Once there was this guy, lets call him Fred, who had a very small penis. Poor Fred thought if only he had larger equipment then maybe the chicks would like him more.

One day Fred went into the mens room and a very short man dressed in green was standing there peeing. Well, Fred couldn't help but notice what an enourmous penis the man had and he said as much. "How did it get so big?" he asked incredulously.

"With magic," the man replied, "I am a leprechaun."
Fred was amazed. "Can you make mine that big?"

The leprechaun could and said he would if Fred would only do him a small favor...to bend over and let him have his way with Fred. Fred agreed and did so. When they were finished he pulled his pants back up and stood.

"How old are you boy?" the man in green asked as he stood at the door.
"Thirty. Why?"

"You're thirty years old and you still believe in leprechauns?"

[ツMiss★Staяღ]

(Sung to the tune of "Winter Wonderland")

Doorbell rings, I'm not list'nin',
From my mouth, drool is glist'nin',
I'm happy -- although
My boss let me go --
Happily addicted to the Web.
All night long, I sit clicking,
Unaware time is ticking,
There's beard on my cheek,
Same clothes for a week,
Happily addicted to the Web!


Friends come by; they shake me, Saying, "Yo, man!
Don't you know tonight's the senior prom?"
With a listless shrug, I mutter "No, man;
I just discovered laugh-a-lot-dot-com!"
I don't phone, don't send faxes,
Don't go out, don't pay taxes,
Who cares if someday
They drag me away?
I'm happily addicted to the Web!

[ȘɱOκίɴ λȼεș]

any 1 seen this man on the lobbys ???

[ツMiss★Staяღ]

omfg
Ewwww
lol

[ツMiss★Staяღ]

I was standing in a queue quite close to a very large woman with a huge arse, when her phone starts to bleep.
A little boy behind her says 'fuck me, she's reversing!' !!

[Bogs Dollocks]

LMAO Aces!!

The Irish Math's Test

Paddy wants a job but the foreman wont hire him unless he passes a simple maths test first.
Here is your first question, the foreman said "without using numbers, represent the number nine"
"Without numbers?" Paddy says "Dats easy" And proceeds to draw three trees.



"Whats this?" The boss asks.
"Have you no brain? Tree and tree and tree makes nine" says Paddy
"Fair enough" says the boss "Here is your second question. Use the same rules, but this time the number is ninety nine"
Paddy stares into space for a while, then picks up the picture he had just drawn and makes a smudge on each tree... "ere ya go"



The boss scratches his head and says "How on earth did you get that to represent ninety nine?"
"Each of them trees is dirty now. So its, dirty tree and dirty tree and dirty tree, dat makes ninety nine"
The boss is getting worried that he might actually have to hire Paddy so he says "Alright last question, same rules again but try and represent the number one hundred"
Paddy stares into space some more, then he picks the picture back up and makes a mark at the base of each tree and says "Ere ya go, one hundred"



The boss looks at the attempt."You must be nuts if you think this represents one hundred"
Paddy leans forward and points to the marks at the base of each tree and whispers "A little dog came along and pooped at the base of each tree. So now you got a dirty tree and a turd, a dirty tree and a turd and a dirty tree and a turd which makes ONE HUNDRED!"

Paddy is now the new supervisor

[ŧŗïςκš†εεr]

Nice one Mike here's one for ya all 8-)

A new pastor was visiting the homes of his parishioners.

At one house it seemed obvious that someone was at home, but no answer came to his repeated knocks at the door. Therefore, he took out a card and wrote "Revelation 3:20" on the back of it and stuck it in the door.

When the offering was processed the following Sunday, he found that his card had been returned. Added to it was this cryptic message, Genesis 3:10."

Reaching for his Bible to check out the citation, he broke up in gales of laughter.

Revelation 3:20 begins "Behold, I stand at the door and knock." Genesis 3:10 reads, "I heard your voice in the garden and I was afraid, for I was naked."

[THΣ GΣNΣRAL]

LMAO KARREN, VERY GOOD VIDEO CANT LAND MORE PERFECT THAN HE DID


RICK L L
NEVER HEARD THIS ONE B4 NICE 1 VERY FUNNY

[м ˘ ƒŽ]

NICE ONES M8S

[шσʟғ.pʀιй¢є]

(07-14-2010 11:18 PM)HardCore! Wrote:  3 men are given a wish each by a genie. An Irishman farmer, a Scotsman and an Englishman. The Irishman wishes for all land in Ireland to be forever fertile. In a flash its done. The Englishman is amazed. I want a wall around all of England so no one can enter our precious land. In a flash a great wall appeared around all of England... The Scotsman said tell me more about this wall. The genie tells him its 500ft high and 500ft thick, nothing gets in nothing gets out. The Scotsman lights up a Hamlet and smiles ..... Fill The Fucker With Water!!

HAHAHAHHAHAHHAHAH NICK AKS